The post is developed in partnership with BetterHelp
There’s a common misconception that couples should only go to therapy when they’re considering splitting up. While it’s true that couples therapy can save relationships or lead to more peaceful separations, it’s not the only reason couples attend therapy together. Deciding to seek couples therapy can be a big step in any relationship.
Understanding when and why to seek professional help can be the key to strengthening your bond and overcoming challenges together. In this article, we’re diving into couples therapy, including what it is, why you should consider it, and how to get started.
What is Couples Therapy?
Couples therapy is a type of therapy that focuses on helping partners understand each other better, communicate more effectively, and solve conflicts healthily. It’s generally facilitated by a licensed therapist who specializes in relationship dynamics.
Couples therapy boasts several benefits, including improved communication, renewed intimacy, better problem-solving, and deeper empathy and understanding for each other. But how do you know if you and your partner need it?
Signs You and Your Partner May Need Couples Therapy
Many couples wonder whether therapy is right for them. Here are several signs indicating it might be time to consider professional help.
- You’re arguing frequently.
- You have difficulty communicating with one another.
- There’s emotional or physical distance.
- There are trust and commitment issues,
- One or both of you are feeling unsupported.
- There’s a lack of emotional or sexual intimacy.
- You’re having difficulties with friends or in-laws.
- There’s been infidelity.
- One or both of you struggle with substance misuse or addiction.
- You’re having financial disagreements.
- There’s an unfair division of labor.
- There’s imbalanced decision-making in the relationship.
- There’s trauma in one or both of your pasts (or in the relationship).
- You’re going through a life transition (i.e., having a baby, getting a new job, etc.)
- You have differing values.
- There’s jealousy or insecurity.
- You have parenting disagreements.
- You have different visions of the future.
- You’re trying to make big life decisions (like having kids, moving towns, etc.).
- You keep arguing about the same issue without a resolution.
- You’re contemplating separation.
If you recognize one or more of these signs in your relationship, couples therapy may offer the support and guidance you need to move forward and grow. Keep in mind there are several other reasons couples may want to attend therapy. Ultimately, if you’d like help strengthening your communication, improving your bond, or overcoming issues, couples therapy may be worth considering.
How to Get Started with Couples Therapy
Should you and your partner decide to give couples therapy a go, here are some steps to get you started.
Step One: Find a Counselor
Start by researching qualified couples therapists in your area. Look for professionals with credentials and experience in couples or marital therapy. Consider asking for recommendations from trusted healthcare professionals or friends who have undergone therapy. If you live in an area where you don’t have access to therapy, online couples therapy through a platform like Regain may be worth considering.
Step Two: Figure Out Financing
Therapy can be an investment in your relationship’s future, so it’s important to understand the financial aspect. If you have health insurance, check your policy details to see if it covers couples therapy and the conditions, such as co-pays or deductible requirements. For detailed guidance on navigating your insurance benefits for therapy, check out this resource from BetterHelp for more insight.
Step Three: Schedule a Consultation
Many therapists offer a short initial consultation, either free or at a reduced rate. This meeting allows you to discuss your reasons for seeking therapy, understand the therapist’s approach, and see if there’s a comfortable fit between the therapist and both partners. It’s a good opportunity to ask any questions you have about the therapy process, session frequency, and expected duration of therapy.
Step Four: Prepare for Your First Session
Once you’ve decided on a therapist and scheduled your first session, take some time with your partner to discuss your goals and what you hope to achieve through therapy. Being clear about your expectations can help guide the therapy process and ensure you’re aligned on what you want to gain from therapy. However, if you aren’t able to discuss and align before the first session, that’s okay, too. The therapist can help you establish goals during the first session.
Step Five: Commit to the Process
Couples therapy requires commitment and work from both partners. As a result, you both must be prepared to actively participate in sessions and honestly discuss your feelings, thoughts, and behaviors. You also have to remain open to feedback and change. It’s essential to commit to attending sessions and doing the necessary work outside of therapy.
Takeaway
Deciding to attend couples therapy is a brave and constructive step towards a healthier, stronger relationship. It signifies a commitment to working through difficulties together and opens the door for deeper understanding and connection. While the idea of therapy may be daunting, it can be incredibly beneficial for your relationship.
