Here are some of my baby rules that I choose to live by!
Listen and learn, Momma!
1. As soon as Mummy takes my nappy off, I roll over and try to crawl for freedom!
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| First, I look all cute and innocent… |
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| …then, up I get… |
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| …and off…I’m away… |
(Yes, this post does contain a BARE BUM *Giggle*)
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| …she won’t catch me! Heh heh heh! She’s too busy taking photographs! |
2. Everytime we’re about to leave the house, I do a stinky, explosion of poo, you know the ones I mean. I make sure it goes all up the back, so Mummy has to change my outfit completely.
This means I get to arrive everywhere fashionably late and in a stylish new outfit of course.
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| No, no real pictures of my actual poo, I have some dignity (and Mummy doesn’t want to get poo on her camera.)
3. When Mummy starts to put make up on, I scream and cry with all my might. She may be planning to abandon me. I will not let her go! Sorry, no pictures of babies screaming. Mummy couldn’t bring herself to take them! |
4. If crying does not abort her mission, I revert to Plan B. Puke all over her nice, clean new outfit when she’s giving me a loving, goodbye cuddle.
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| Stock photo, as Mummy does not tend to take photos of her shoulder covered in Baby Sick.
5. Smile and giggle at whatever inane things grown ups say to me. |
6. Be a smiley, happy, baby until Mummy is telling someone what a smiley, happy baby I am.
Never smile for professional photographers.
7. Have overnight growth spurts.
It is funny to see Mummy confused when I can’t fit into the same sized sleepsuit that I wore the night before.
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| I used to fit these! |
8. Put adults and big kids to sleep.
See, they think they have got the knack of getting me to nap, but in fact I am the Biz at getting them to snooze when snuggling with me.
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| Working on getting Danny to sleep… |
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| …success with Caitlyn! My sleep charms work every time!
9. What’s yours is mine. |
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| See, Caitlyn’s hat is way cooler than mine! |
10. I don’t want toys. Toys are just imitation.
I want the real thing to play with.
Real phone, real keys, real flowers.
Because, “Doo be boo, I wanna be like you-ooh-ooh!”
But, of course, this is just for humour, the real rules are:
There ain’t no rules!
